Home News These Christmas carols tell story after good 2022 in New York sports

These Christmas carols tell story after good 2022 in New York sports

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You’ve waited all year for ’em (well, at least my wife has). So here’s to Christmas 2022. Deck the halls and clear your throats …

“Make it Rain”

[“Let it Snow”]

(as sung by Steve Cohen)

Oh the season was straight delightful

Till October made it blightful

And since I’m worth more than Spain

Make it rain! Make it rain! Make it rain!

Well deGrom went off Cowboy rustlin’

So I made a call to Justin

“Hop onto my cheddar train!”

Make it rain! Make it rain! make it rain!

When the Wilpons were still in charge

Coins were pinched, like the Grinch, parallax

Now Uncle Stevie is livin’ large

I’ve got my own lux’ry tax!

Here’s Nimmo, Senga, Quintana

And who knows who I’ll woo mañana

Ohtani? I’ll buy him Maine

Make it rain! Make it rain Make it rain!

“Hoping for the Best in Yankeeland”*

[“Walking in a Winter Wonderland”]

Yankees fold, Hal is cringing

Back in Queens, Cohen is binging

A 13-year plight

It just isn’t right

Hoping for the best in Yankeeland

IKF, must you flounder

Through your legs, skids a grounder

Hicks duffs a fly ball

Then jogs to the wall

Bracing for the worst in Yankeeland

Yankees
Aaron Judge
AP

At the winter meetings sits the Cashman

He pretends that he plays Moneyball

He’ll say, “Need a prospect?”

They’ll say, “No, man.

“But here’s a bloated contract, pay it all!”

Later on, fans perspire

Boonie’s moves all backfire

Still face unafraid

The Astros remade

Hoping for the best in Yankeeland

In the outfield we have Judge and Stanton

We’ll pretend that they’ll play all the games

Trainer’s whirlpool will be up and crankin’

With random torn obliques and DJ’s sprains

With Rodon, we’ll aspire

To the flag, maybe higher

To face without faze

The Rays and the Jays

Hoping for the best in Yankeeland

Number 28 in Yankeeland …

“It’s a Most Unusual Time of the Year”

[“It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year.”]

It’s a most unusual time of the year

Whether Jet or a Giant

They’re stubborn, defiant

And play with no fear!

It’s a most unusual time of the year

It’s the foot-ballsiest season of all

Dexter, Sauce, Thibodeaux

Saleh, Wilson, Moreau

And ol’ Brian Daboll!

It’s the foot-ballsiest season of all!

Zach
Jets quarterback Zach Wilson (2) and guard Nate Herbig.
Bill Kostroun/New York Post

There’ll be Lions for slaying

Commanders for flaying

Or else playoff odds become bleak

There’ll be much Danny-Diming

And Zach Wilson subliming

To stay in the hunt one more week

It’s the most unusual season in years

One team’s keeping receipts

And the other drum-beats

They’ll draw Tom’s Buccaneers!

It’s the most unusual season … in … years!

“World Cup (What’s a yellow card?)”*

[“Christmas (Baby, Please Come Home)”]

(Sung by casual American soccer fans)

World Cup (Was that called offside?)

World Cup (I still don’t see how)

World Cup (What is injury time?)

World Cup (Should be done by now!)

World Cup (A striker goes down)

World Cup (He’s writhing on the sod)

World Cup (The fans all going mad)

World Cup (Sub this flopping fraud!)

Lining up to build a wall

Lionel Messi during Argentina's win over Croatia.
Lionel Messi during Argentina’s win over Croatia.
Getty Images

Messi really struck that ball

Can’t someone beat France this year

Give us Yanks some Yuletide cheer!

World Cup (The folks in the stands)

World Cup (Are weeping so hard)

World Cup (Here’s a referee)

World Cup (What’s a yellow card?)

They’re yelling, “That’s a hand ball!”

But I think they just want to stall

Oh, no, another PK!

Nil-nil games every day!

World Cup …

“Here’s What I Liked About 20-2-2”

[“These are a Few of any Favorite Things”]

Aaron Judge smashing the record of Roger

Gil in the Hall, all-time Met, all-time Dodger

Johnnies and Bonnies and Rams and Gaels, too

Here’s what I liked about 20-2-2

Saquon and Zam finding holes, run like thunder

Donovan Mitchell (OK, there’s a blunder)

Saquon Barkley
Saquon Barkley
AP

Devs, Isles, Rangers with Cups in their view

Here’s what I’ve liked about 20-2-2

When the Knicks lose

When the Nets snooze

When they play no D

I dream of do-overs

From baseball’s Octobers

And then I don’t feel … grouchy …

KD rains 3s and J. Brunson’s a keeper

St. Peter’s run as the ultimate sleeper

October Bader hit .333

Time to get ready for 20-2-3 ….

— With Rob Ricco

Vac’s Whacks

Louie Orr was a gentleman and a joy to cover when he was at Seton Hall. Plus, as a young St. John’s fan way back in the day, the “Louie & Bouie” show struck fear in me whenever Syracuse faced the Johnnies. Godspeed to a good man.


Tuesday will be the 40th birthday of one David Allen Wright, and like most athletes who played their whole career here — Derek Jeter, Eli Manning, Henrik Lundqvist, others — it’s a number hard to fathom, because in the mind’s eye they are forever 25.

Mets
David Wright
Robert Sabo

The big news Friday in Jets land was Mike White and Zach Wilson. But Robert Saleh also wore a shirt commemorating the Sunday fundraiser in honor of Greg Knapp, the Jets’ passing game coordinator killed in 2021 by a “distracted driver.” Jets coaches and staff will run the steps at MetLife to benefit the Coach Knapp Memorial Fund. Fans can also participate at $100 per climber at a site of their choice. For more details visit knappmemorial.org/stairclimb. Saleh’s shirt had “986,000” on it — the number of deaths each year caused by distracted drivers.


The latest season of “The Crown” is fine, but I keep expecting Bunk to show up at Buckingham Palace and bring Prince Charles down for a chat with some of the corner crews. (Fans of “The Wire” will understand.)

Whack Back at Vac

Marty Galvin: How unprepared did Joe Flacco look last week in Buffalo? He looked as ready as Ralph Malph did when he was called in and took his warm-ups off and wasn’t even dressed in his uniform.

Vac: One of the fastest avenues to being included in this feature is to drop a splendidly random “Happy Days” reference.

Jets
Joe Flacco on the bench during the Jets’ games against the Bill last Sunday.
Charles Wenzelberg/New York Post

Joey Sowinski: The Mets got a lot more expensive. And a lot older. But did they get even a little bit better? No! (I won’t hold my breath waiting for this little missive to show up in your Whack Back at Vac section.)

Vac: Breathe, Joey! Breathe!


@Yoplin: Any chance you can get Jalen Brunson to handle the ball to end a game instead of Julius Randle? Pretty please?

@MikeVacc: If I had such powers, don’t you think I’d have tapped into them by now?


Bruce Welsch: When I was a kid, my parents would tell me, “Play shortstop, play shortstop!” I should have listened to them.

Vac: Ain’t that the truth?

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